A Whole Lot a Talking

I had a conversation with bell. It was odd in a way .. I do not talk much about being a Haruspex. People forget that is who I am. They think of the what. The "what" I am is the Ubar. Which is all right .. that is what I do at the First Fires. People get to talk to the Ubar .. let him know any concerns .. opinions on prospects .. tell me good job Fonce ... or try to trim my edges a bit with something they are bent out of shape about.

Bell has never really been like the rest with me. Something that I noticed and was the main reason I collared her to my own personal collar. Anyway .. much the same .. she asked me some questions about gifts. I like to talk about myself .. same as anyone else. Just do not do it often.

She has a gift with the kaiila. A gift that others have noticed .. Cana being one of them ... and Cana has been teaching her things to go with that gift. I have seen a lot of improvement in bell since she left my collar. Something I will have to think on more later.

She was speaking to me of that gift ... and asking me if I had it. I told her .. now the following is all my opinions about my Clan and about me. Not anyone else's. Certainly does not go for all Haruspexes. Anyway .. I told her I did not have time to listen to animals. My Clan and my life depends on me listening to more important things .. and shutting out the other. A Haruspex does not make a living here in the Tribe by listening to animals. Of course now that I said that one will show me dead wrong. Which will please me to no end because I like creativity. But .. for me? I do not listen to them. I have to choose.

She asked if I blocked out the noise. Now I told her .. it is not so much noise for me .. like a heartbeat or the beating of a drum. For me it is ... things that fill up the space.

She said everyone had a noise .. a sound ... to her.

It would be nice .. easier ... if everyone had a noise for me. I could tell them all apart and chat easily with each one. But that is not how it works. For me. Never has.

There are times when that space is all filled up and busting out the edges ... and times when there is silence and emptiness. I do not hear voices .. I know they are there. I know the words of past and present .. sometimes even future ... rest just at the edge and were I to step away from my path to either side I would hear them.

But I am not listening.