Some Things Change .. Some Remain the Same

I am irritated. Big surprise.

And it all boils down to my opinions again. My feelings. But I guess when it comes to me .. that is what counts .... right? I mean .. if you want to know what makes me tick .. what gets to me .. what makes me like you or not like you ... it is my feelings that need to be considered ... right?

Now in the great grand scheme of things .. what does it change? Nothing important. Just things within me.

Since when is a slave wrong for serving me? Since when does a slave have to apologize for caring about me? Am I not her master? Am I not the Ubar? Why does her service to me demand her apology? She did nothing wrong.

Those who demand it .. offend me. She was free at the time to serve any person at the fires .. she chose me. For a moment she put my feelings first. And what does she get for it? Belittled .. cut apart and strictures given. Driven to the point that even though I publicly defended her .. to those who accused ... she still acted shamed and sorry.

Two things came out of my irritation that night.

One .. it will be a long time before I believe those involved when they say they care about me.

Two .. it will be along time before I publicly defend that slave because what I did was a gift that was discarded in the face of other's disapproval of her service to me.

I hate waste.