Stand .. Deliver ... and Cough

I have never personally witnessed a free woman handle more male genitalia than I did today. How Shi puts up with it I will never be able to guess. It takes a certain kind of man to be that all right with his mate that he will let her do such in public. Go Shi.

Not only did she examine Ba'atar's balls but also the other prospect's .. Talon. And Saresh of course who stood and delivered strictly volunteer. Now for me to enjoy such there would have to be a hell of a lot more naked female flesh than there was.

Is this what healers do? Would I be all right with that? Even if it were not in public .. would I be all right with it?

I can not answer that right now. I do not know. I know I would not be all right with my mate doing it in public. That I do know. If she is going to feel up men because that is her Clan and her duty .. it certainly will not be a show for everyone else. But .. now I am not so sure that I would be all right with it at all. It was a rather "in your face" example and though it was done all in fun to torture the prospects .. it still left me deep in thought about my own preferences. Not anyone else's preferences .. not what works for Shi and Silken or anyone else ... just for me. I am realizing how much of a private man I am and how much I enjoy that privacy .. both for me and the person I want to spend time with. I do not want other men to think of my mate in that way .. or to know how her fingers feel on their cock.

I really had not thought about it until now. I really enjoyed that free and easy give and take of sexual innuendos at the fires. But how would I feel if it were my mate saying those things? In front of other men .. and making them wonder .. just how she would be. I must give this more thought. I do not have the answers yet. For now it is all good .. I do not feel possessive or protective of anyone. But what if I did? Fuck I just need to stop thinking about it all.

In the mean time the sexual double talk still goes on and we all enjoy it and if there is a slight hesitation on my part .. it is just the quest for answers in my own head about my own preferences and what that will mean .. or not mean ... to me in the future.