Fate and Destiny

Oddly enough though .. it seemed the Sky had run out of ammunition for the day. Beo and I made it back safely to the camp and even took the ribbing and teasing for the beast we took turns riding. Holo did not seem to mind much .. I think he even blushed a little at all the attention. Stupid kaiila.

Beo and I split up as we reached our wagons .. each of us looking for water .. food and some salve for even though it did not appear we had been burnt at all .. the memory of the heat was still a living beast upon us.

I went down and bathed myself in the stream until I am sure my body thought I meant to freeze every cell solid. I washed away the dweller stench and the scent of tree smoke from my hair. The scent is light .. almost like perfume ... compared to the heavy smell of the fire I am used to. I sat naked on the bank of the stream and I braided my hair. I was no longer so angry. I was tired and I felt all beat up on the outside and just comatose on the inside. I tried to feel something about the last two days but I could not. It was just like none of it mattered any more. None of it was important. It was not a dark place I was in .. it was no place at all. A great nothingness place.

The wound on my chest was bleeding again and I dressed it and myself. Keeping the wound that would not heal beneath my jerkin and hidden from eyes until I could figure the damn thing out. Made no sense .. though I did know it was tied to the dream war somehow. That thought just sunk me even deeper into the blue funk I had found ... for if the dream war was lost ... how would I ever hope to heal the damn thing?

That evening though something happened that made me realize that Fate and Destiny still had a hand in the game. Something good happened. Something .. something positive.

Cana asked to speak to me away from the fire and I of course went to do so. Cana always manages to ground me a little .. a tug back to a lighter place. This time she spoke to me of dreams. I had to mentally shake my head a little .. I was rather disgusted with the subject at that point. But .. this was different. This was about something else. And not only was it something good and positive .. something I was terribly envious of ... but she shared it with me. She shared something that she said was meant for me. She handed me a white feather. Not a black one. A white one. How did she know? What did it mean?

I was speechless .. but I think I thanked her. I hope I did. I could not believe my good fortune. Now .. what to do with it?