Headache in Blue Minor

I have a headache. It is blue in color and submissive in nature. And do not for a moment think I mean it is less than or any easier on the gray matter by being so. If anything it is worse.

Slaves are not supposed to be problematic. They are supposed to be a solution. To some other problem. A comfort. They are also female. Whose brilliant idea was that again?

Anyway .. I have a headache. A pain within my head caused by trying to figure this out. And I am going to relate it by how it appeared to me. Why? Because that is how it happened. I do not know how it appeared to anyone else .. I am not anyone else. If I was perhaps I would not be in so much pain.

I saw blue today. She was carrying a handful of water around I guess ... I was told that later though I did not really notice it at the time. Why? Because like most men I was not paying attention.

Later she brought her water to me and struggled to tell me something. And I do not mean that she struggled with words... she had no words. merely this cupped hand of water offered to me. I finally said ..it is water? She nodded. I waited .. You want me to do something with it? She nodded ... she wanted me to.... drink it.

Linger on that for a moment. Just let your thoughts nibble around the edges and think about it.

I asked her if she was insane ... had lost her mind .... at least misplaced the thing if not destroyed it all together.

Let us skip the idea of drinking water someone has been carrying around in their hand for over an hour ... if that is even possible. Why? Because I do not want to hang out there and let the idea seed itself in the fertile soil of my imagination.

Let us instead simply .. and for the purpose of my sanity ... deal merely with the issue of a slave offering me to drink from her own fingers and the ideas of dominance and submission and how that went all wrong for me.

Well that did not take long did it?

I thought she was going to throw up on my boots or pass out into the fire. She came completely unglued from the inside out and I still have no idea why it was so intense for her to try to explain to me why she thought it was a good idea to offer me disgusting water from her fingers like she owned me.

When she was finally able to spell it out she did so like she was someone else. Talking from far away and about someone besides herself. Whatever it took to get it out I suppose. It seemed she had an experience with water and thought it profound. I can hear that one. Profound enough she wanted to offer water to me. I am not sure why but I could at least at that point appreciate the idea of the gift even if I did not want it .. at least how she wished to give it to me. I did however allow her to put the water into a bowl and bring it to me. If I cringed as she scraped the soggy skin of her palm on the edge of the bowl I did not show it. The idea of the gift was not something I intended to malign or destroy any more than I had all ready done.

If blue was a slave from earth .. or recently collared I might perhaps ... no I would still not get it. There is just no way I am going to be able to wrap my understanding around this one. Every time I do it feels like someone is inserting a sharp blade deep through the bone of my skull and easing it into the slightly resisting gray part.